And a voice comes out of the Darkness, saying: “About ruddy
time, too! Could Grimvizaj have cut things any finer? Go on, they’re over there
somewhere. Get to it!”
Titchy perceives dimly (I think I mention that’s how he
usually perceives things, but, fair play, he is in almost total darkness) a tall,
spiky, shadowy horseman, barking commands.
From across the room there’s a flash of fire and something
like a wasp with its tail on fire comes flying past him.
“Get to it, I say!” insists the horseman. “What are you
waiting for?”
“If you were to get off your high horse for a moment and
explain…”
Dimly (got it?) Titchy perceives the horseman dismount and
advance towards him menacingly.
“I’m sorry if the situation is over your head,” snarls the
spiky shadow, “But we’re under attack here!”
Bang! Another inflammable wasp whizzes past.
“And,” he continues, “as you’re the ruddy reinforcements –
Top Secret, hush hush, but definitely not illegal in any sense, state of the
art constructs Grimvizaj has just sold me – at the cost of an arm and a leg,
may I say (but, fortunately, not mine) – is it unreasonable of me at all to
ruddy well expect you to do your ruddy job – “ Bang! “and ruddy well do some
reinforcing!”
“There’s no need to talk down to me – “ Titchy begins…
Woof! (Can dogs laugh?)
“We’re not reinforcements, we’re just passing through on our
way to the Larder.”
“Well, good luck with that. The Larder is currently a no-go
area. It’s been barricaded by dozens of these ruddy men with their ruddy
firesticks. It’s all we can do to stop the rest coming up from The Aquifer to join
them.”
“Ah - " suggests Elfbow, “we've made a wrong turning, no doubt."
“We should go back to Grimvizaj,” says Merlissa, edging back
to the door they’ve just ocme through.
“Oh, come on,” snarls Getrude. “Where’s your fighting
spirit? We’ve come this far. Keep Questing and
Carry On. What’s a few fireworks? Look at Gerald. Does he look scared?”
Staring at Getrude’s staff, they have to admit, he hasn’t
a splinter out of place.
“Mmm, fireworks,” mumbled Gnawbone.
“Look – even Gnawbone is ready to rumble.”
“Er – “ the shadowy figure held his spiky arm before them.
“As you do - er -rumble, please watch out for our lads, won’t you?”
“Our lads?”
“Your reinforcees. Nice chaps. Grey, faceless, no mouths.
They don’t say a lot.”
“Clerihew will have some company at last.”
“If they look grey, odd and slightly mis-shapen, they’re the
good guys. One of Grimwaj’s bargain experiments. All I could afford. Our last
line of defence…”
“And the bad guys?"
"Anything in a uniform. Anything with a
wand of fire. There’s a fleet of them off the coast somewhere – been sailing for nearly
a year, it seems. Come from a ruddy place some call Challenge Island. Others call it the
Refuge of the Damned…”
“They’re after the Greatest Treasure the World has Never
Seen!”
“Quite possibly. Apparently their Island was invaded just
over a year ago by a plague of mad warlords, who all left random troops in
weird uniforms all over the place. Once they’d finished fighting amongst
themselves, they realised it was their manifest destiny to do similar things to any
other indigent people they could ruddy well find.”
“You don’t get more indigent than us!”
“Precisely. Anyway, Grimvizaj was at that time running a
very lucrative sideline in sorceress enhancements. He had apparently inflated
balloons for the witches on Challenge Island more than once. And he may have
become a little overfriendly with one of those dear ladies…”
“Nonsense!” cried Merlissa. “He wouldn’t dare!”
“… and somehow let it slip that hidden in the Chambers of
Challenge is the Greatest Treasure etc etc. In a matter of months, we were
beset with these rapscallions with their firesticks and their painfully natty
uniforms. More of them every day. Grimvizaj, has been desperately making
new monsters as fast as he can, charging me through the nose - or, in one case, for the nose…”
“Bless his little cotton socks,” murmurs Merlissa.
“But virtually every monster has been slain or has fled to the darkest deep
depths of the dungeon. Er, Chambers. But now the invaders have broken through
to the Larder they can simply take one Chamber at a time till they
come across the ruddy treasure. Our only hope is that some brave adventurers
can make it to the Altar of the Snowlord, raise him from his long slumber, so
he may ruddy well deploy the might of his dormant Power.”
"Well, good luck with that," says Elfbow. "If we come across any, we'll let you know."
“It's a disaster!” cries Titchy. “They’ve sealed the Larder. It’s
the end of the world! What will we do without snacks?”
“Then,” cries Getrude, “we must imitate the action of a
tiger, gird our lions, make ourselves unbearable and follow Gerald into the
fray!”
Gerald wags at the darkness like an angry umbrella.
At once a rapid rattle of ricochets broke out, leaden wasps
zooming around the chamber as if their nest had been smashed with a hammer, and
five grey figures flee towards them.
“Get back, you ruddy cowards!”
The spiky creature clambers onto his spiky horse and rides into the fleeing figures.
“How about we imitate the action of a very sneaky tiger, and
sidle round the wall to that glow of daylight over there?” suggests Elfbow.
“Two words? First word rhymes with ‘spud’? 'Good'? Second
word? A short aircraft?
“'Plan'? 'Good plan!'”
“Woof!” says Scruff.
“Fire?? Works???”
***
The latest Frostgrave expansion, The Red King, introduces
nullmen, who are “nearly featureless humanoids who shine with an unearthly grey
light”, never communicate and appear to move without clear purpose. These seemed ideal for greyscale (which I’ve never before attempted) but I had no models. So
I downgraded some plastic Zulus (one Warlord and 4 Perrys) by shaving, filing
and liberally spilling polystyrene cement. I figured that these strange
creatures would nevertheless communicate with each other and, if their movements
seemed odd to ordinary people, then maybe they were indulging in some form of
elaborate communicative dance – so I positioned the limbs of the models as oddly and dynamically as I could.
I tried several approaches to greyscaling – zenithal priming,
a series of washes and, finally, black undercoat followed by lighter and
lighter drybrushing. To be honest, I’m still not happy with the results, but
they’ll do.
The Lord of Ruddigore is GW’s old Voice of Sauron model, on
foot and horseback.
The “invaders” are 12 Perry Napoleonic Spanish, painted as
the Volunteers of the Isle of Leon. I mentioned last year that I’m slowly
building a Spanish Naps army, but my guiding principle is to get as many pretty
uniforms on the table as I can. I do love a man in uniform. I won’t mind seeing
their backs frequently in games, if they’re prettily arrayed, and these black
uniforms with sky-blue facings will be a nice contrast with the white and
yellow of other Spanish units.
The black figures, of course, are highlighted with grey, so
I think I can count all 20 of these figures as Shades of Grey.
18 x 28mm foot figures: 90 points
1 mounted figure: 10 points
I think we generally give additional points for flags
(saving your reverence, y’r Minionship): 1 point
Chamber: 20 points
TOTAL: 121 points
Plus 2 Squirrel points and 61 points in the Napoleonic side challenge.
